Our MUST HAVE Holiday Gift Guide! 🎁

There can be a lot of pressure trying to find the perfect gift for that special someone, but sometimes our budgets don’t quite match our shopping list. But that’s OK! Today, we’re going to give you our list of must have’s for this Christmas. Now, these might be some of the most expensive gifts you’ll ever give, but the great news is that they won’t cost you a cent!

Our first expensive gift that you can give that won’t cost a cent is Honesty. I know, I know - this probably isn’t the kind of gift guide you were hoping for, but maybe it’s the one you need! You see, sometimes we try to spend money on big ticket items in lieu of opening up and being accessible with people. A shiny new present is great, but if it’s standing in place of something that actually needs to be said, honesty is a much more valuable gift. The funny thing is, some of us would rather spend way more money than we even have to try to avoid having to share and be honest with the people who are close to us because rejecting a new toy hurts a lot less than being rejected ourselves. Relationships, however, can’t be built when we’re stuck in defense mode. We have to be willing to let our guards down and be vulnerable if we ever hope to build a better relationship down the road.

Gift number 2 is Time. Just like presents can’t take the place of honesty, presents can’t replace your presence either. Taking the time to sit and talk with a loved one in the middle of the hectic atmosphere of the holidays can be one of the most meaningful gifts you could give to them. Letting them know that you’re not here for the gifts, or the food, but because you genuinely want to be with them. Think about it. When someone takes time out of their day, letting go of their schedule and agenda just so that they can let you know they care about you is one of the best feelings you can get. The affirmation of love that comes from that gives you a warmth that comes back every time you think about it. That would be a great gift for you to be able to give your loved ones this winter.

Gifts 3 and 4 go hand in hand; Understanding and Forgiveness. The holidays can sometimes have a way of bringing up old wounds and past offenses. All of us have hurts from our childhoods that we can carry with us on into adulthood. When our parents didn’t receive the love and affection they needed when they were growing up, it would be difficult for them to figure out how to give that in a healthy way to you all on their own. Nowadays, we have the luxury of education, books, research and support both in person and online that it can be easy to project onto others the expectation that they should know what seems so obvious to us. Even with all of these resources at our disposal, how many times do we miss the mark? Understanding comes from giving others the benefit of the doubt and recognizing that they’re human, just like us. They failed. We failed. Maybe not in the same way, but in millions of different ways. When we give the gift of understanding, it allows us to both give and receive our last gift on this list, Forgiveness.

When we give the gift of forgiveness, it’s kind of like giving someone a gift that we get to enjoy, too. Bitterness and resentment are self-destructive ways that we try to make the other person pay for how they’ve wronged us. They’re saying, “I have the right to be mad at you because of what you did to me.” That may be true. But, the cost of bitterness and resentment is like student loan debt, no matter how much you try to pay it down, there’s always more interest that wants to keep you paying for the rest of you life. Trying to force someone to pay won’t undo the damage that has been done. Forgiveness, on the other hand, frees both of you from this debt. Forgiveness isn’t saying it doesn’t matter, it’s no big deal or that what they did was ok. That’s denial. Denying a debt just pushes it down the road, collecting interest and eventually the debt collectors are coming back to get what they’re owed. Instead, forgiveness recognizes the wrong but releases the other person from the responsibility to pay it back. In freeing them from this debt, it means you no longer have to be consumed with trying to make them pay for it, which gives you the freedom to rebuild your life and move forward, with or without them. Forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean restoration, but restoration can’t come without it.

Just an FYI - Join us next week, Thursday, Dec. 30th at 4pm CT for the last live podcast of the year! We'll be live on our YouTube channel and on Facebook!